Thursday, November 22, 2012

what I'm thankful for

Just read my pastor's blog about thanksgiving, and it made me want to post my own list of what I'm thankful for.  So here goes:

I'm thankful for my church home at a new location.  Making the switch to LFC-D was not easy at first, but now it feels like home.   I love the size and the feeling of knowing people.  I love the amazing students I meet and hang out with that so enrich my life.  I really like our new community group and the putting down of roots with new people.  It feels like home.

I'm thankful for the way God has use physical adversity in those I love to challenge me, shake me, teach me and ultimately draw me closer to him.  It has been a hard year watching Ruth suffer with post concussive syndrome (AKA wicked headaches) and my mom suffer with the advanced stages of multiple sclerosis.  God is healing one slow and taking the other unto himself slowly.  It is the "hard"  from which he blesses me.

I'm thankful for emotional health, for the days and weeks when depression seems like a packed-up box shelved in the corner of the attic.  But I would be remiss if I didn't admit I'm thankful for the depression as well because nothing drops me to my knees and leads me to rely on God like it.  I'm very thankful for my comrades in arms, those who suffer alongside me and "get me"... for Karen Millin, who will always laugh and encourage me and lets me say anything.  For my husband, who watches me like a hawk to make sure my head is above water, who steps in with "suggestions"  when I'm indecisive and who never judges me.

I'm thankful for my friends.  For Virginia, Jennifer, Angela & Julie.  I love doing life with these guys.  For the lunches and walks and bike rides and the countless calls and texts that make me feel known and loved.

I'm thankful to be a student again for the first time in over twenty years.  It is a blessing to learn.  And speaking of school, I'm thankful that my three babies are having such amazing years in school, both academically and socially.  Unlike Mike, I'm thankful for swimming.  I love the chance once a month to steal away with my daughter and watch her excel at something she deeply loves.  And I'm thankful that this past year Huck and Ruth have both found a sport that they are passionate about.  There are few greater joys than watching your child deeply enjoy a sport.  

My family is my greatest source of thanksgiving.  We love, laugh, fight, cry and just do life together.  It is the biggest joy, the greatest ride, I have ever known this side of heaven.  My children amaze me and humble me and make me glad every day for the privilege of being a Mom.  My husband is by far the best gift God has ever given me, and I awake everyday and want to be with him and near him.

I'm thankful that in November 1985 God reached down and made himself known to me in such a deeply private and personal way that I could no longer denied that I needed him or that he loved me.  He has changed me; thankfully, for me and for those around me, I am not the same.  I wonder sometimes what life would be like if he hadn't touched me;  I feel certain I would by now have a trail of sorrow and broken relationships where joy and love now exists.   So I'm thankful.  So very, very thankful.